Jack Keefe's Blog

Location: Chicago, Illinoise

I pitch for the Chi. White Sox and in the winters I go back to Terre Haute which is wear I am from.

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Buzz Kissinger Hates Blogs Al

Well now they are all up set at Buzz Kissinger who writes with an old Olive Eddy one key at a time for the finest of slick magazines and some kid Will Leech who lives in the attic above his moms garage and writes a blog on the Inner Net they were on Costas yelling at each Other I am of two mines here Al. One thing is I also am a blogger but I do not use no bad language as is wrote in Deathspin where on every page Mr Kissinger says they have comments like Hello There Fetus Face Ozzie Guillen and Frank Thomist I Like Your Manly Boobs. I make sure that all my writing is in Grammar and I use Spiel Czech. But I also think Mr Kissinger is wrong to say that Mr Leech is full of brown Stuff because he does not read W.C. Heinz or William O. McGeehan or Nunnally Johnson I have not read them neither Al and I am none the worse for Where. It just goes to show you as I always say do not take a coupla snifters of V.S.O.P. before you go on Costas or you are not likely to know what you are saying like last year when Costas had Carl Everett and Richard Dawkins and that Cardinal Rathskeller who is Pope now and they talked about Evolution and Carl had had two Mojitos too many and by minute 12 he was saying he was descented from an Ape and kissing Rathskeller's ring and begging forgiveness.

Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Nick Swishy Bats 1st

Well it just goes to show you Al some people think Ozzie Guillen is not the sharpest Sharpie in the ten-pack of Sharpies but he is a base ball genius and he now bats Nick Swishy 1st because you can not steal first base and this Spring Ozzie Guillen proved it using the Scientific Method. In our early spring games he thought up a play where A.J. Pierogi who can no longer hit his way out of a Papier Bag could get his OBP up to snuff by stealing first base. The way it worked was this A.J. would run the count to 2 and Oh or maybe Three and One a good runners count and then when the pitcher started his move to the plate A.J. would take off like hell from the batters box running toward 1st Base. The first time he did this the Umpire calld a strike for leaving the Batters Box and second time he called A.J. out and third time he just said ^%#&^$# Pierogi and thumbd A.J. to the showers and so you see Al we have what we call Dada Points from which we can infur that you Can Not Steal First Base.