Jack Keefe's Blog

Location: Chicago, Illinoise

I pitch for the Chi. White Sox and in the winters I go back to Terre Haute which is wear I am from.

Thursday, October 27, 2005

The Sox Are Champs Al

So Al I was talking to T-Mac Carver in the clubhouse last night and he said to me Jackie I do not know why he called me Jackie it is what my old mam called me but any 1 else who does I usually punch in the nose but I had cups of Cold Duck in each hand and so I did not punch Carver but any rate he says to me Jackie How does it feel to win your first World Serious in 88 years and I said Beats me I have only been here 2 years and Carver said How special is it for the people of Chicago and I said I am from Terre Haute. Then Carl Everett grabd hold of the waste band of Carver's shorts and Carver made a little noise. That did not stop him long next Carver askt me Jackie talk about Ozzie Guillen what has he meant to this club. I said Carver he has meant a 8 month ear ache and I will be happy not to listen to his guff for the next winter or so and Ozzie Guillen passed by and got me in a head lock and gave me a Dutch Rub. Then Carver said to me Jackie how do you grip a 4 seam fast ball and I said whatever way it comes to me from the god damn catcher I was getting a little steamed Al but little Gucci passed by and Carver askt him how it felt to win his first World Serious in 88 years and Gucci said "Ate beer! Ate beer! " and poured an Old Style on Carver the boys chuckled at that.

Now I dont know what I will do for the winter Al I seem to have spent my pay and I already told Carl Everett that I would sine my Serious check over to the Carl Everett Intelligent Design Museum in Balk Springs Texas they need it to help people know that devolution is only a theory well Al there is always my old job reshelfing sports documentarys at the Block Buster in Terre Haute. I may bring Gucci with me as he needs to learn some language if he expects to play in America next year and he can shelf the Anime for he knows the Asian American alphabit.

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

We Win Game Three Without Keefe

Al we are leading the World Serious three games to none no thanks to yours truly last night the game was 14 innings and we used 19 pitchers and none of them was Keefe. Cotts pitched and Jinks and Polite and Dustin Hoffman and Mr. Bloom pitched 2 innings & hit a home run and at 1 point we borrowed the Houston short stop Biscayneo and he pitched an inning but no where in the box score do you find the name Keefe. I had a little chin wag with Ozzie Guillen about this after the game and he ex plained my roll in games like that. Keefe said Ozzie Guillen what would of happened if we had gone 114 innings and I had used Contrary Burly and Freddy Garcia for complete games and we had got 40 innings out of Rowland Office throwing a knuckle ball then if I have no pitcher I am stuck it would be like the all star game where Bud Selugh called it a dead heat. You Keefe are my Rocco Gibraltar without you I am staring into the vast Abyss. This made me feel a whole lot better also when Mr Williams stopt by and said I still get my full share even if I do not pitch tonight so I guess I will go to the mall this morning and see if some of these guys in cowboy hats recognize me I will wear my White Sox jacket Al for luck.

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

Here We Are in Texas Al

Hey Al people are starting to write comments on my blog 1 nice gentleman left something about Paranormal Mesopotamia and if you click it you see free ads for music that was sweet of him though Chris Widget our catcher says that it is only a robot still I am happy if even a robot talks to me Al. We are here in Texas getting ready for Game Three this Houston is a nice burg Al they have palm trees which I did not know they had that other place we play in Texas against the Fort Worth Rangers of Anytown has no palm trees it is a waist land Al. Ozzie Guillen says we must not relax in this pairadice we must play like it was thirty eight degrees with the wind hauling down out of frosty Waukegan but I say a little baking for the old soup bone never hurt Al.

We Did Win Game 2

Al guess what we did win game 2 on the plane here to Tex. I sat next to Potsetting and he told me he hit a home run in the 9th Was it a ground ball to the track I said No a home run like anyone else over the fence Did a little kid reach out with a fish net and haul it in I said but Potsetting got miffed and would not talk to me. I wish I could have seen that home run but I had my parker up over my head trying to stay dry Tim Reigns he is our base coach said boys savor these moments as they pass you do not know how quickly they become mere memories and I said Coach no worries I remember nothing what soever.

Monday, October 24, 2005

I Think We Won Game 2

Al I must say there are few places I would less rather be than Chi. October freezing in the rain and me with only a cloth hat to keep the moisture from my scalp not even a Brock a Brella. In the bull pen last night we gave each other hot foots to keep from perishing dogs and cats took shelter under out benches and Bobby Jinks passed out at 1 point we had to rub his arm with snow to get his juices going again. I do not remember the game it was raining so hard it hurt to open my eyes but at the end the boys in white were jumping up and down at home plate so I went & jumpt too it seemed they would not of been jumping if we would of lost nor either if we only just got a bunt down or a good call on on a hit by pitch so I guess we go to Texas up 2-0 Al and they better lower the roof and turn on the steam heat.

Sunday, October 23, 2005

We Win Game 1

Well Al you have probly heard by now we won game 1 of the Serious it was never much in doubt. The Houston club started a pitcher Roger Clemens he was once pretty good but looked a little peaked to me and mean while we got a home run from German Die and the usual home run from Joe Creed and several other scores brought on by our mad scampering which was a delite to be hold. For pitching we had Contrary let me tell you his story Al. Contrary is a Cubano American who once swum to Tampa so he could pitch for the Yankees but Mr Steinburner used him about twice and cast him onto the midden heap. Now he pitches for the Sox and though he is aprox 77 yrs old he can throw a complete game like you or me could pull on our boxers. 1 character who did not pitch in game 1 though is your freind Jack Keefe I did call Ozzie Guillen in the middle innings to suggest my name but Ozzie Guillen said Keefe I can not talk now I have the Fox network people on Line Two.

Saturday, October 22, 2005

Today the World Serious Starts

Well Al I am not sure I am doing the right thing here every 1 says I should blog the World Serious what is blog I ask them they said it is like a letter to Al or an email but you write it on a special screen and up it pops like a baseball off of Carl Everett's bat.